Pick your time period: |
year 20013 - first part (Kim, Swiss B*s, sell, Yenderful, comet, Frogtiff, horse, Scots, ban, A war, Boeing.)
year 2013 - part two (Jerico, Frogdis, wowheads, chaos, tectrash, fight, cold, 38°, ding dong, 25 yrs late, UK English, slow cook.)
year 2013 - part three (Foodlyness, price of loyalty, missed by media, grave worries, wine whine, BBC rap, bad taste.)
year 2013 - fourth part (Tribute to LEMG, parole, poor sun, Berlu***nison, cycle of death, bits, keeping up.)
Other Blogjob years - Blogjob main menu
Tribute to L. E. M. G. Pathetic Parole Where The Sun Don't Shine Burned Up Cycle Of Life And Death - Ed. Two Bit Business Keeping Up With The Neighbours Foodlyness - by our sometime food correspondents Hamilton Berger and French friend F. Ries.
Price Of Loyalty Missed By The Media Grave Worries Over Minister - S.t.O Education, Edu... Can't Be Bothered Wine Whine - E.M. BBC, Take The Rap -- E.M. (Infinity Junction's opera and booze correspondent.) Taste Is A Matter of Taste
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One of Infinity Junction's longest established panel reader/commenters and occasional reviewer passed away shortly before Christmas. An avid and fast reader, architectural heritage campaigner, technical writer, mother of two, friend of many, Lesley E.M. Guthrie died far too young of menigitis, not realising the illness she had was as bad as it was. Larger than life, loud and irrepressible at times, ever cheerful, ever active and seemingly capable of taking on anything, she will be very sadly missed by all who knew her. Read In Peace, Lesley.
Another case of the English parole board's stupidity comes to light. Victor Nealon, a one time postman, convicted of sexual assault and jailed 17 years ago has finally been released from Wakefield prison. He should have been let out years ago but he kept on protesting his innocence, because he was innocent. Prosecutors at the time and since have refused to use DNA evidence for no clear reason. In the end privately paid for DNA testing proved his innocence. NuGgets column at Infinity Junction has critcised the policy adopted by the parole board before and we do so here again. It is completely illogical to expect someone to admit to a serious offence if they haven't done it, but the parole board believe they are the arbiters of truth, well they patently are not. We also say the policy of no regrets, no release is wrong. The infamous case of Tony Martin, which we featured some years ago is an example; he shot an intruder into his remote farmhouse after it had been repeatedly attacked and said he'd do it again in the same circumstances. The parole board kept him locked up after he'd served his time simply because he was stating his intention to protect himself. They should all be locked up. (The parole board that is.)
As predicted here in NuGgets at Infinity Junction, a couple of years ago now, the UK government is to end subsidies for solar power and onshore wind farms. Solar panels are pretty well worthless in the northern half of UK because we just don't get enough sun. Simples. Even those further south who do generate surplus power are taking money out of the pockets of those of us too far north who cannot benefit. Unfair. Good riddance to subsidies. Oh, and it's all being done on the quiet under cover of mourning for Nelson Mandela. We wonder how long they've waited for a big enough fuss to hide the news.
Comet Berlusconi failed to reappear. Observers believe that the gravity of the situation meant downfall was quite likely. Still, all bad things have to come to an end, eh, and you have to see the funny side. Tee, hee, as we've said of him before. Oh, pity about Ison.
Five deaths in nine days on London's Cycle Expressway. That's a sorry story. The most recent was a classic case of a bicycle on the inside of a lorry on a corner. (Cyclists- that's a real no-no, never put yourself in that place! The lorry driver often cannot see you.) The cycle lobby, including London's buffoon mayor BoJo, blames drivers. However as both a cyclist and a motorist, I have noticed increasingly lunatic behaviour by cyclists and think the pro-cycle lobby itself is partially to blame for the increase in deaths. Why? Because they push and shove and make such a fuss that cyclists feel they are more 'powerful' than they really are; caution has been blown away. But then I'm of that school who walks my bike across busy junctions and through dangerous corners via the pedestrian route. Now we have ubiquitous cycle markings, (round here most of them unused by cyclists,) the idea of cyclists's caution isn't pushed any more. It also seems the cycle markings are done to a formula rather than individually thought out and tailored. They take no account of large vehicles or traffic snare-ups forcing cars to deviate. It means some of them are not that safe. Time for a re-think? Time for better awareness not just by motorists but by cyclists themselves.
POST SCRIPT-After this was put up, 5 in 9 days became 6 in 14 days. It is reported that senior London police voices say they wouldn't use the cycle expressway.
Who ever came up with the idea of virtual money? Well now a whole load of this "bitcoin" money has been 'stolen,' presumably by a virtual thief. Virtuality seems to have virtually no virtue compared to a real bank.
For a country with extremes of poverty and wealth, it seems a bit incongruous that India should be sending a satellite to Mars. Surely that money could have been better spent on the ground alleviating some of the worst social problems? Of course China has its space program too and a long and disputed border with India. Is this therefore tit-for-tat?
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Two bits of food sillyness were picked up on subtitles. Somebody asked for a bastard chicken, eventually the person asked worked out they wanted basted chicken. (Next it'll be chicken in a bastard- Ed.) Then sombody complained there was no topping on the pizza, told to turn it over, miraculously the topping revealed itself, magic, eh.
UK Labour party dismissed PM CamEton's £200 tax break for married couples with "Who's going get married for £3.86 per week?"
You'd think discovering real water on Mars would generate some headlines, wouldn't you? Well Mars dust has been shown to be 2% water, that's a lot in total, but no mention in the main news.
Philip Hammond, our War Minister (Defence, Ed.), repeatedly claimed that Saddam Hussain had gassed syrians last week. (BBC Newsnight.) What, from his grave? I suspect he should have said Assad, but who knows what he really meant. Fortunately this clown, (Hammond, not Hussain, nor Assad, Ed.), is not going to be allowed to retaliate because, in an historic vote on the same night, UK parliament vetoed direct action.
25,000 school leavers took the exams to get into university, NOBODY passed! Both Liberian universities are now scratching their corporate heads as to where to find good enough pupils. Liberian education minister put the failure down to lack of ambition and poor English. You thought we were bad...
Some disgraced ex communist leader called Beaujolais, if you believe the radio, is whining about his own ex police chief who he accuses of lying. It's all Chinese to me. (Bo Xilai; EM always has booze in mind, Ed.)
Was Saturday's Urban Prom the worst ever? Well, while our steemed editor is on a summer break, I've sneaked in my answer: yes, it was terrible. What the hell are a load of big-headed rappers and DJs doing making a din in a Promenade Concert? It was utter rubbish, come on BBC admit it and don't do it again.
According to Adverising Standards Authority in UK, an advert by Marmite was "in bad taste." (Marmite is an extremely strongly favoured yeast extract paste.) As the old saying goes with Marmite, 'you either love it or you hate it.'
Tribute to L. E. M. G.
Where The Sun Don't Shine
Cycle Of Life And Death - Ed.
Two Bit Business
Keeping Up With The Neighbours
Foodlyness - by our sometime food correspondents Hamilton Berger and French friend F. Ries.
Price Of Loyalty
Missed By The Media
Grave Worries Over Minister - S.t.O
Education, Edu... Can't Be Bothered
Wine Whine - E.M.
BBC, Take The Rap -- E.M. (Infinity Junction's opera and booze correspondent.)
Taste Is A Matter of Taste
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Walls Of Jerico ?
According to BBC text, volleys of field gun shots are to be fired at Nottingham castle. Do they mean at or do they mean from? We'll watch the news tonight!
And another... Text over spending review report on channel 4- concentrating on the £10 burger Osborne ate as he was putting finishing touches to it- had several goes at the word Gourmet: gore may, (several silly attempts,) then finally gormet. The final one came quite suddenly as if somebody in the studio had noticed the spelling problems, even then it was wrong!
Heads In The Stars - 2
Horizon on BBC revisted the Black Holes story and came over all "wow" again. I don't get it with astronomers. It seems obvious that there'll be something at the centre of a swirling mass, like galaxies, which holds it together, otherwise why aren't all the stars and planets following the general trend of rushing away from the big splung, or whatever it was? Why then so amazed at black holes at the centre? Most astronomers come over on TV as dreadfully naive.
Officially Afghanistan is in charge of all military operations there now. Unofficially there are predictions of trouble because Afghan forces are not always perceived to be diligent or well enough trained to cope with battle-hardened militant extremists. In a country which is economically and socially backwards, you can understand the appeal of regular good salary and therefore the number of unsuitable recruits joining the army. Is that the tick of a time bomb?
Fish Trotter - by our edyou k shan correspondent G Otto Duffskool
30% of English primary kids think cheese comes from plants. (Actually it does but very indirectly- Ed.) A further 25% think fish fingers are made from chicken or pigs. (The clue is in the name- Ed.) British Nutrition Foundation also say 10% of English secondary school kids think tomatoes grow underground. Is it possible the The National Curriculum is out of touch? With Gove in charge that is no surprise.
A few winters ago NuGgets carried an article on the futility of leaf-blowers: rakes are cheaper, lighter and quiet. Well, right outside our office here in deepest darkest Cheshire we witnessed another cock-up of modern technology. Opposite us there is a pathway below a four foot high earthen bank with a tough hedge on top of that. Years ago the tricky bits of grass and weeds on that bank which overhung the path were cut by hand by a bloke carrying a shoulder-hung petrol engined strimmer. Today we watched, incredulous, as a complex hydaulic contraption mounted on a four wheel drive digger, with numerous controls took over twelve minutes to cut about three square metres of variable slope, blocking an entire lane of the road in doing so. Strimmer man would have done that in four and never slowed down a passing car. I suppose Health and Safety stopped the £150 strimmer in case it grazed the operators protective boots. Now we have £150,000 bloody slow nuisance machine. Progress.
Follow-up:There now is a huge, scalped bald patch where once was a pretty stretch of celandine. That would not have happened with a strimmer.
Follow up to follow up- Three months later and they're back to strimming!
Fight, Fight, Fight!
Everything is about Europe in England just now. There is no doubt that English people are fed up with interference from those over-paid busy bodies in Brussells: not being able to send terrorrists and their sympathisers back where they came from, a single person's rights are more important than the public's right to safety it seems. Then there are the mounting costs, large scale immigration, increasing usurping of political, financial and legal powers to Europe; that is not what Britain originally signed up to. So it is no surprise that UKIP, the independence from Europe party has done well recently. Now CamEton, our right-wing PM, is running scared and promising change or out. Amongst all this though there emerged a rather amusing slanging match between English (trying to be British) independence activists and Scottish Nationalists. Maybe we should do what school kids occasionally do and shout "Fight, fight, fight!" They won't though. Farage has already run back to England with police help and FarmedFish is a greasy coward.
Post Script- Britain has already refused to adopt some European regulations. One Infinity Junction associate is employed by Airbus and currently works in Europe up to twelve hours a day, six days a week, as part of a special "fix it and get back on schedule" team. They can't do that in Europe because of the 'Working Time Directive' so that British team is in great demand working under English regulations.
Global Warming, The Sequel
Here we are smack in the middle of May at low altitude and with snow. After the coldest, wettest nine months on record in 2012 and spring 2013 being a month late due to cold winds, following the previous two incredibly cold winters, we wonder what the scientists are talking about. It was only a few years ago that in May we hit 35°C here at Infinity Junction. Take all that into account and we have significant global cooling right here.
Fifty-Three_Point_Three Into Thirty-Eight - Ed.
About two years ago Infinity Junction members received forwarded emails, from the obscurely named 38 Degrees organisation, which became the prelude to a new era in British politics. Here in our deepest darkest boondocks Cheshire, approximately 53.33° North, we signed an ultimately massive on-line petition to stop our forests being sold to developers. The very right-wing Tory government were stunned, so much so that a year later the plan was dropped and forests pledged for public appreciation. Since then right-wing plans to privatise the NHS and Fire Service etc have received enormous battering from million-plus signature petitions. For the first time stupid plans like dropping global warming and evolution from school syllabuses and paying failed directors monster sums of money to resign have been put to non-political scrutiny and resistance. I wish 38 Degrees had been around when The Wicked Witch had been in power: Britain would now be a better place if she'd been constrained.
Ding Dong The Wicked Witch Is Dead
Monday night (8th April) saw unprecidented spontaneous celebrations all over Britain, some so big the police had to break them up. They were called 'Ding Dong The Wicked Witch Is Dead' parties. Perhaps this could become a spring version of autumn's Guy Fawlkes night when effigies of the traitor are burned.
25 Years Too Late
That bane of all that is wholesome both socially and financially in Britain has finally popped her cloggs. Infinity Junction as a whole feels no sadness. It was 'That Woman' who sold off the family silver for a pittance, now British Rail, as was, is an expensive mess thanks to Thatcher's privatisation zeal. No win no fee, was another Americanism imported by her and now we have a compensation culture stifling all aspects of life from the NHS to outdoor activities. Everything American was good to her, bonkers, it would have been nice to export her to USA, butter up her friend right-wing Ronnie, mess up their economy, not ours. Ghastly woman, good riddance.
Lost In No Translation
Trailer for Welsh TV program:- "The economy, it's about money really." It seems that in Wales English has to be translated into English.
Hinckley Point is the first approved site for a new UK nuclear power station in decades, but will it ever be built? Despite planning permission, EDF who gained the go-ahead, still don't know whether it's worth doing. Negotiations on maximum tarriffs go on and on, and on. Don't bother watching this space: a decision will not be hurried. Let's hope for warm winters ahead as older UK power stations go off-line at an increasing pace.
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Bing Bang Bong
'Loonytic' Kim Bang Bong appears to have declared war on the world with threats of a pre-emptive nuclear strike on the USA and scrapping of non-agression treaties. USA shrugged it off as "North Korea sometimes uses extreme language." I haven't seen anybody in the UK quaking with the fear of Kim, in fact most people just laugh at the diminutive fattypuff. He should take a leaf out his father's book... "I'm so ronery..." (From Team America.) Now that WAS funny.
Cat With A Gastric Band
It's not often we have much to say about Switzerland, apart from moaning about the poor performance of Swiss managed investments, but this is a real turn-up. Early indications are that the people have voted to limit top salaries and bonuses. Switzerland, a land of fat cat bankers and tax exiles; can you believe it? If it happens, it should be a beacon to all who believe in at least a degree of equality. This comes a week after European governments agreed some limitations on bonuses too. Can sense be breaking out in Europe? (Nah, Ed.)
Sell, Sell, Sell
Britain's Conservative government is obssessed with privatisiation. Why? So far privatisation has only made services worse and more expensive and lost the taxpayers money. The latest wheeze is worse than most but has not yet been publicised beyond Private Eye magazine. They plan to sell off our national security fuel pipeline, the GPSS. Madness! (See Private Eye no. 1334, 22 Feb 2013, page 36, Fuel-ish behaviour.) This is not widely known but supplies fuel secretly underground to air bases, airports and other strategic places. What can possibly be gained? It cost about £600 million to build, yet would only fetch a tenth of that and could leave Britain's most sensitive transport and military hubs in the hands of foreigners. Double madness!
¥en and Yang, A Balance...
Japan has suffered a 'double whammy' in recent days. First it was critcised by an international forum for manipulating its currency value, smacked on the wrist and made to promise not to do it again. Then figures came in showing that the artificially low yen had added 10% to Japan's balance of payments deficit. Infinity Junction's NuGgets column has once before cast doubts on the ability of Japan's financial advisors, we think quite rightly now. It's a bit like the controls on some Japanese designed TVs; not very logical.
Boondocks Theory - the horsemeateor scandal spreads
There was a risk assessment some years ago about who would be most likely to suffer a meteor strike. The answer was that any meteor(ite) was most likely to come down in the sea or out in the boondocks nowhere important. Ha, we thought when one came down this week in Russia; they were right. The reason for this is simple, nobody here has ever heard of Chelyabinsk. It so happens that in Infinity Junction HQ there are 4 world atlasses, many road maps and around a hundred sheet maps of most places in the world. The biggest atlas, The Times Atlas, missed out any detailed maps of central Russia altogether and its all Asia section did not have any large towns in that area shown at all. It was found eventually in a much cheaper atlas and what do you know... its a bloody huge town! So much for boondocks theory. Now the question is, why do so many atlasses show nothing in detail east of the Urals? Answers on a post card from Chelyabinsk please.
Angeliron Merely and Francois Frog appear to have broken up. With France getting the lion's share of the European agriculture budget, they wanted a big rise in spending. CamEton, threatening all sorts of dire consequences if Europe doesn't mend its high spending ways, found himself backed by the owner of Europe herself in an unusual Anglo-German no-budget-rise pact. Whatever next?
Big Coincidence Week
In the same week that the bones of King Richard the Third were confirmed to be those under a council car park in Liecester, horsemeat was proven to have been substituted for beef in many manufactured food products. Richard's catchphrase- "A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse."
Alex FarmedFish should repent the day he chose a date so far ahead for a referendum on Scottish independence. Ever since SNP came to power on a backlash against what are seen as essentially English parties, Labour and Conservative, support for the idea has declined at a pretty steady rate. If it carries on like that until R day, he'll be lucky to get 20% in favour of breaking away. If that is the case, might he not think it better to shelve the referendum altogether so as not have such a big defeat? And come to that waste so much money- see last year's blogjob on police commissioners.
And we now have CamEton promising the same for Britain and Europe, as it stands now that referendum would be close call.
Good Ban - Ed.
Figures just released show 12% drop in serious asthma in the year after a ban on smoking in public places came into force. As a mild asthmatic I have always avoided cigarette smoke and banned smoking in my home. I can't stand the smell either. I have had serious words with certain smokers in the past when they lit up in my non-smoking area. Often they don't see what the fuss is about. When they can't get enough oxygen through clogged lungs and ruined heart, they'll rue their habit, but it'll be too late for them and cost our NHS millions.
African War - (Ed.) A warning.
Some time ago I started but didn't finish a mystery novel set immediately after 'The African War,' an invention of mine. As things are moving now, with continuing trouble in Somalia, Mali, etc, caused by Islamic extremists, and on-off wars in central Africa about diamonds, greed, power and ethnic struggles, it looks more and more possible. There are conflicts and unstable 'governments' in both Sudans and weak rule in Somalia and some smaller African countries. We also see unfinished business from 'The Arab Spring' uprisings, notably Egypt and in countries like Syria close to Africa. Some strange alliances were made before and during the Second World War and there is no reason to believe it won't happen in Africa. Pan African war is possible. Things are made worse by ineffective African Union forces and endemic rampant corruption. The UN is apparently apathetic and major powers such as USA and Britain have had enough of involvement in other peoples wars. Europe is consumed by its own woes. Russia is in Putin mode, ie inlooking and uncooperative. Unless people start waking up, I can see African war sneaking up on us. (Which will mean I'll have to finish that novel!)
A Jump Too Far? - by (welcome return of) Stew the Oil
Boeing's 787 troubles were somewhat dismissed by friend who works for rival Airbus, with a factory not far from here. "It often happens to new models." He should know: he's fixing Airbus A380s. "Boeing though did take one hell of a gamble with technology," he added. "I wouldn't be surprised to see some of that new technology dumped; they just don't know enough about it."
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|That's all so far|